Chapter 116: Extra: Game Show Episode 1, Part 1
Chapter 116: Extra: Game Show Episode 1, Part 1
Jia Hyson: Hey guys, it seems we're switching things up a bit at the ask Jia corner on Sunday!
Bebe: ...we've only done this once wtf are you making it sound like a big deal
Jia Hyson: ...
Bebe: Anyway, we'll be holding a game show type event instead of what you previously expected. They'll be four random teams of two consisting of all the previous gongs and host and Bebe.
Jia Hyson: Fans can ask questions in a separate channel (ask-Jia-questions) as well as vote for other questions you like, and our cute little host @the immortal tree will pick the popular ones to be asked to the teams.
Bebe: Teams will answer and also do follow up questions if needed by tree or someone picked by tree.
Jia Hyson: Then you vote for me and let me win hehe
Bebe: ...
Jia Hyson: I mean, then you vote for the team answers you liked best with emojis and those with the most votes until tree announces times up, will win a point.
Bebe: Thats better.
Bebe: Team with the most points at the end wins the a million p.
Bebe: Thats why you better vote for Bebe okay?
Jia Hyson: Hey, wait a-
(due to obvious reasons, you can't see the discord emoji reactions which is a huge pity cuz they were so funny lol. If you want to see it all join the Beta be a fan discord if you already haven't.)
...
Host Immortal Tree: Welcome to the beta be a beta game show! A brand new feature brought by our generous sponsor Overlord Li Jun's R&D! Overlord Li Jun's R&D: where we make what you don't necessarily want.
Host Immortal Tree: This little system has been a rising star in the multiverse so today we will be interviewing key figures from the system's adventures. The contestants have been separated into four random teams. By the way, an inter-reality filter created by sponsor Overlord Li Jun makes it so that contestants see host Jia Hyson as the character he inhabited entirely for dramatic purposes.
Host Immortal Tree: The name of the game is this- I, your beautiful and charming host The Immortal Tree of no specific gender shall choose questions from the audience. The team that gets the best reaction from you, the audience gets a point, the team with the most points at the end splits the million p prize, that's right folks, one million p is the prize.
Host Immortal Tree: It's time to introduce the contestants! A total of eight people divided into four teams with completely randomly assigned names
introducing.....
Host Immortal Tree: Li Guiren and Sefu who make up the Old Man Team!
Li Guiren: Aiyah how hurtful, we aren't that old. Fifty is still middle aged right?
Sefu: .....Can you not. I was still in my late twenties early thirties during most of my arc okay?
Host Immortal Tree: Jia Hyson and Monroe in Team Not incest! Come on down!
Jia Hyson: Heyyy everybody!
Jia Hyson: Also wtf is this name guys.
Monroe: Hello. Thank you for everyone supporting me in the first arc. Even though I didn't get my brother in the end, at least I'm paired with him now.
(Drake in the distance: Booo)
Host Immortal Tree: Now here come's Team Dumb and Bitchy!
Drake: These team names are really awful.
Bebe: Yeah, why the fuck is this one so blatantly insulting?? What the fuck.
Host Immortal Tree: And finally, last but not least, the Spicy chicken Team with Da Gong and Tian Shun!!!
Da Gong: Cluck [Hello]
Tian Shun: .......
Tian Shun: Am I the only one who sees a rooster as my teammate here?
Tian Shun: Hello???
Host Immortal Tree: Haha, welcome welcome, lets get right to the game.
Jia Hyson: woo!
Host Immortal Tree: We have polled your biggest fans(?) for their most burning questions!
Host Immortal Tree: First, what is the worst gift you have ever received? Remember viewers to react and vote for your favourite answers.
Host Immortal Tree: Old Man Team!
Sefu: My Prince once gave me a handmade necklace.
Li Guiren: That doesn't sound so bad.
Sefu: This servant later found out it was handmade by his current sex friend who wished to express their love for my prince.
Li Guiren: oh
Host Immortal Tree: Ouch! What a burn.
Bebe: Booooo what a slag booooo.
Jia Hyson: ballofshame.gif
Sefu: What's your worst gift?
Li Guiren: Um, if I had to say.
Li Guiren: My son?
Sefu: ..
(Tian Shun, in the distance: Fuck you too old man!)
Li Guiren: Yup. My son.
Sefu: You're a bad dad.
Host Immortal Tree: Amazing, ten votes for the old men already!
Host Immortal Tree: Team Not incest
Monroe: Worst gift was my brother leaving for that damned tv show.
Monroe: Oh and my sister Maddy too I guess.
(Maddy in the audience: )
Jia Hyson: Someone gave me trichomoniasis*. That was shit.
*An STD but can also be spread by sharing wet towels. Can be cured with an antibiotic called metronidazole, which is usually taken twice a day for 5 to 7 days.
Monroe: I would be happy to play doctor and administer metronidazole** for you brother~
**it's pretty effective in suppository form hehehehehe
Jia Hyson, flushing: *Cough* Good boys shouldn't really
Monroe, leans in and whispers: But I don't want to be a good boy. Come, let me help brother ah~
Host Immortal Tree: Haha, remember folks, this system television network is completely unrated
Host Immortal Tree: Team Dumb and Bitchy!
Drake: Listening to the previous conversation is probably the worst gift for me
Bebe: ...Getting this slutty host is clearly my worst gift
Host Immortal Tree: Ouch, it seems that the audience has reacted negatively to your answer bebe, remember, one million p is on the line!
Bebe: fuck
Host Immortal Tree: Spicy chicken Team! Last but not least!
Tian Shun: Every birthday alone and without Wei Wei was the worst gift in itself.
Tian Shun: What do you have to say to that... chicken?
Da Gong: Cluck [Ye Cheng gave me a round stone to play with. Useless gift. Dislike.]
Tian Shun: guys seriously wtf
Da Gong: Cluck?
Sefu: Don't be mean to a bird kid.
Host Immortal Tree: Interesting, Tian Shun it seems that a chicken is more popular than you with 9 votes.
Tian Shun: .....
###The whole world is against me##Why is it so hard to beat a chicken, seeking help###
Host Immortal Tree: Hahaha, well its time to tally up the votes and it seems that the team with the highest reaction is....
Host Immortal Tree: OLD MAN TEAM!
Sefu: wow
Li Guiren: Woo! I feel young again
Sefu: .Stop making us live up to our team name.
Audience: HAHAHHA
Host Immortal Tree: It seems the audience disagrees fellas
Sefu: ...
Host Immortal Tree: Alright, onto the next question, this one is a little more personal
Bebe: oh no
Host Immortal Tree: Are you an ass man, a chest man, or a leg man?
Team Dumb and Bitchy
Bebe: Bebe doesn't care but legs Bebe supposes. They look nice. And good ones allow hosts to run from danger faster which is good.
Drake: Hehe, I'm an ass man. Especially for my baby's tight, warm hole that refuses to let me go~~
Bebe:
Bebe: Bebe wishes Bebe could let you go.
Host Immortal Tree: Once again the system television network is completely unrated.
Old Man Team!
Li Guiren: I'm a leg man. I can't help but appreciate a pair of nice thin, but strong legs.
Sefu: I suppose I'm an ass man. Nothing like a plump spankable bottom that isn't completely soft but just enough to have a nice jiggle after each impactmnnn
Bebe: why
Spicy chicken Team
Da Gong: .Cluck? [My worm's tail is very cute, I like to play with it a lot, so I suppose ass?]
Tian Shun: Chest. The way Wei Wei shivered under my touch, and how sensitive he was when I pinched his nipples.. hehe
*Da Gong used Wing Attack!*
Tian Shun with a mouthful of feathers: Peh! Peh! You damn bird! We're on the same team!
Team Not incest
Monroe: I like chest. When I saw brother come out of the shower with just a towel around his waist and the water dripping down those, those- nosebleed.gif
Jia Hyson: All of them. Ass, chest, legs? Face, arms, neck? All of it arouses me ah~~~
Gongs, all look at themselves, then at each other: I'mBetterThanYouSneer.jpeg
Bebe: .Perverts. Peh.
Host Immortal Tree: Haha, remember folks, vote for the answer you like best, that way we can tally up the votes properly. However it seems the answer that received the best response is Da Gongs with eight votes!
Da Gong: Cluck
Tian Shun: yay
Host Immortal Tree: Interestingly, it seems that our audience enjoys scolding these perverts a lot ah.
Jia Hyson: Do we still get points from scolding reacts?
Host Immortal Tree: Hahaha- no.
Jia Hyson: QAQ
Bebe: hehe someone's not getting their million p
Host Immortal Tree: *whispering backstage* A-ahem! its time for a message from our generous and very handsome and merciful sponsor
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Bebe: Fuck, I forgot Li Jun was sponsoring this shit.
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Film Empress Noc: -and now, back to our regular programming.
Host Immortal Tree: Are the teams ready for the next set of questions?
Jia Hyson: hell yeah
Bebe: that million is mine
Gongs: ...
Gongs: eh
Host Immortal Tree: Glad to see you are motivated, I really really need this show to work.
Host Immortal Tree: haha
Host Immortal Tree: *ahem*
Host Immortal Tree: NEXT QUESTION
Host Immortal Tree: What's a dealbreaker for you?
Spicy chicken Team
Da Gong: Tch. [Non-cute worms]
Tian Shun: Bad parents (stares at Li Guiren fiercely)
Team Not incest
Monroe: For me if a person has a loving family and doesn't value them that's a dealbreaker ah.
Jia Hyson: Generally people who want to kill me are a deal breaker.
Bebe: .Generally?
Jia Hyson: ehhh generally
Jia Hyson: like they must be very hot
Jia Hyson: veryyyyy hot
Old Man Team!
Sefu: Too timid is too boring, I like them coquettish and kinky like my kitten hehe
Li Guiren: Unwilling to stay with you when you're the most vulnerable. If they can't support you then, then there's no need for their support at all ah.
Team Dumb and Bitchy
Drake: If you're female it's a dealbreaker. Sorry ladies.
Bebe: coming from the ex-male lead of a straight bad smut novel that's pretty fucking rich ah.
Drake: ....What about you then?
Bebe: Jia Hyson.
Jia Hyson: Hm?
Bebe: No, I mean, it's a dealbreaker if you're Jia Hyson.
Jia Hyson: You bastard.
Jia Hyson: I'm a catch
Host Immortal Tree: The votes have come in and.....
Host Immortal Tree: The winner of this round is TEAM SPICY CHICKEN!
Tian Shun: ...I finally pulled my weight?
Audience, yelling: NO, THE BIRD!
Host Immortal Tree: It seems the simple and direct preferences are most popular.
Da Gong: cluck
Host Immortal Tree: Haha, you're so great contestant Da Gong.
Audience: HAHAHAHA
Tian Shun: ...
Tian Shun: theres a sense of loss in victory here
Host Immortal Tree: ON TO THE NEXT ROUND
Host Immortal Tree: What would the sexiest costume/cosplay outfit worn by your ideal lover in bed be?
Team Not incest
Monroe: cough Playboy bunny rabbit outfit in pink isn't bad. Shy.jpeg
Monroe: Brother, what about you? Don't by embarras-
Jia Hyson: Military uniform! Oh my god! Navy! Police! Yes! Fuck! So hot! Ahhhhh!
Monroe:
Monroe: mumbles I can probably fit into my school uniform which is lying around somewhere.
Host Immortal Tree: Smell something?
Monroe:?
Jia Hyson: ?
Host Immortal Tree: Smells like desperation in here.
Jia Hyson: Lol
Monroe: .....
Spicy chicken Team
Tian Shun, flushing: Sexy Angel cosplay
Da Gong, covering his face with his wings embarrassedly: Cluck, cluck, cluckcluck, cluck. tch, cluck. [If my little worm could wear my melted feathers like a small cape and dance. tch laozi wouldn't be unhappy.]
Audience: AW
Bebe: Don't you aw you fucks in the audience, isn't that the human equivalent of him asking for a sexy dance in a boyfriend shirt??
Audience: WE KNOW!!
Bebe: ...
Bebe: omg Bebe isn't going to win this game
Old Man Team!
Sefu: Magical Girl cosplay. I'm not a fan but those outfits for my kitty. (swallows heavily)
Li Guiren: Slutty policewoman cosplay with handcuffs.
Sefu: ...That's it?
Li Guiren: What can I say? We're old
Sefu: Don't put WE
Team Dumb and Bitchy
Drake: Microbikini hehe.
Bebe: Cosplay as Skyn-t or Ultr-n. (edited)
Drake:
Monroe:
Tian Shun:
Da Gong:
Sefu:
Li Guiren:
Jia Hyson:
Bebe: What? Evil villainous overlord AIs are hot. Fucking sue me.
Host Immortal Tree: The votes are in!
Host Immortal Tree: The winner is Sefu of team GRANDP- I mean- OLD MAN!
Sefu: the name ruins the victory
Li Guiren: Aiyah you gotta get over this
Host Immortal Tree: Not surprisingly the audience seems to have a few degenerates among them.
Jia Hyson: If there wasn't we wouldn't be able to get sponsors
Bebe: So true, the audience are all pervs
Bebe: Don't deny it
Host Immortal Tree: Fair enough. Anyway. After this question we will have a commercial break.
Host Immortal Tree: If we took a look at your Google search, what would be the last thing we would see?
Old Man Team!
Sefu: Latest Victoria's secret line, pastel, ribbon. No G-string.
Li Guiren: How to have sex without touching someone.
Jia Hyson: .wow even I would be ashamed to admit that on multiversal television
Bebe: Fuck they said it so fast too. Shameless!
Host Immortal Tree: Once again i would like to remind the audience and sponsors that the system television network is unrated.
Spicy chicken Team
Tian Shun: How to fake your own suicide it didn't work orz
(Li Guiren at a distance: You motherfucker)
Da Gong: Cluck [How to keep your worm happy and healthy]
Audience: AW
Bebe: Wow it really sucks how the most popular gong is with one of the least popular huh
Tian Shun: That's not very nice, no matter what it's just a chicken.
Sefu: Pft, the chicken isn't the unpopular one here lol
Li Guiren: Hahahahahahahahahaha oh god hahahahahahahaha fuck hahahahah
Tian Shun: ..
Host Immortal Tree: ? the pairings are completely random
Tian Shun: Are you sure.
Host Immortal Tree: ?
Tian Shun:. . .
Team Not incest
Jia Hyson: Eh, this is hard, I have a lot of tabs open I don't remember. I guess it's probably Weird Google searches.
Monroe: Why did you search on Google what were weird google searches anyway?
Host Immortal Tree: Lets bring up the records
Jia Hyson: what
Jia Hyson: We didn't have to bring up the other teams
Host Immortal Tree: Your world was a novel world. It is in our database. If no answer is given official records will be dredged up.
Jia Hyson: .....
Jia Hyson: *sweats* Fine I'll speak the truth.
Jia Hyson: I wanted to see what My Little Pony was about okay?
Jia Hyson: I was curious. HidingFaceInHandsBlushy.gif
Monroe: .... (shit, he's so fucking cute)
Jia Hyson: W-what about you?
Monroe: How to search other people's search histories ?
Jia Hyson:
Monroe: You have more than one search on MLP
Monroe: It's adorable brother~
Jia Hyson: ...
Monroe: I was also curious
Jia Hyson: . (shit, he's lucky he's so fucking cute!)
Host Immortal Tree: And now the answer from the most forgettable team, Team dumb and bitchy
Drake: ...
Bebe: ....
Drake: Um
Host Immortal Tree: ?
Drake: Um
Bebe: What is it?
Drake: I, uh, don't want to say.
Bebe: Oh my god
Drake: Can I abstain?
Audience: NO
Host Immortal Tree: Once again, we do have the official records.
Bebe: Drake, did you not hear what the other teams said? What is worse than that?
Host Immortal Tree: You can also choose to be eliminated
Drake: Skip?
Bebe: Say it or Bebe loses!
Drake: ..Has anyone told you, you're very aggressive ba?
Bebe: BEBE NEEDS THAT MILLION P! SAY IT, YOU DUMB WHORE!
Jia Hyson: Bebe...
Jia Hyson: Bebe do you have gamer debts again
Bebe: ....
Jia Hyson: He. He.
Drake: Fuck. Well. Um. I searched whispers
Bebe: What was that?
Drake: I-I searched how to stop my partner from cumming too fast!
Bebe:
Drake:
Jia Hyson: What. Did. You. Say?
Host Immortal Tree: ...
Bebe: ....Bebe just searched for different ice cream flavours.
Bebe: ....Bebe is boring.
Audience: YEAH
Bebe: ....This audience is awful ah.
Host Immortal Tree: Well... after tallying up the results, we had a rather unexpected result.
Host Immortal Tree: Jia Hyson and Li Guiren... both received eleven reactions.
Jia Hyson: Woo
Li Guiren: Hehe
Jia Hyson: What now?
Host Immortal Tree: ?Tie breaker game. Tell the worst secret you kept from each other.
Jia Hyson: ...
Monroe: ...
Host Immortal Tree: Person who cries first loses
Li Guiren: I have one.
Li Guiren: Sefu. The truth is I'm younger than you.
Sefu: What.
Li Guiren: I died in my arc but you lived till old age
Li Guiren: Therefore. I'm actually younger
Li Guiren: Soul wise
Sefu: ...
Host Immortal Tree: ...you were supposed to say the worst secret you kept from Jia Hyson but okay.
Jia Hyson: To be fair it did sound like it was to the other teammate ah
Sefu: ..... (existential crisis)
Host Immortal Tree: So unless Jia Hyson comes up with something worse, Old Man team get the point.
Jia Hyson: ...I really can't think of anything worse than that honestly.
Monroe: Yeah.. same. sorry
Host Immortal Tree: Remember, the prize is for one million p
Monroe: Hey I was a very good brother okay! I didn't do shit like put cameras in bathrooms or read Adrian's diary.
Jia Hyson: ...I didn't tell you I had a diary
Monroe: ...
Monroe: moving on, Li Guiren wins
Host Immortal Tree: THE POINT GOES TO TEAM NOT INCEST
Sefu: WHAT
Host Immortal Tree: And now.
Host Immortal Tree: A mesage from our sponsor.
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Host Immortal Tree: aaaand we're back.
Host Immortal Tree: Remember, you are definitely allowed to hurt your team mate and other contestants.
Host Immortal Tree: as long as it is on camera.
Tian Shun, still with feathers in hair: ...
Sefu, still suffering from the blow about age: ..