The Beautiful Monster

Endings might mean new beginnings, but there was still pain in the end. There was still sadness that Alyssa couldn't shake as she watched the two movers that she hired hauling her things in the back of a moving truck.

She chewed on her bottom lip, trying to keep it from quivering.

Against her own will, her eyes shifted left and right, looking all around her as she stood in front of her dorm building for the last time.

She knew that she shouldn't look for Elias. He abandoned her without any warning.

Just a stupid little note that meant nothing to her. She must've meant the same to him.

Alyssa directed her eyes back to the movers, who were carrying the last two boxes of what she owned into the back of the moving truck.

She was about to be on her way to New York City, and she wasn't going to look back. She already said goodbye to Zoe, and she had said goodbye to everything else when Elias left her behind.

As much as she tried to push herself forward or act like she didn't care, her heart was crushed.

She felt so detached and numb to everything around her, and she wondered if she would ever be able to grow attached to anything or anyone ever again. The thought of love left a bad taste in her mouth.

What if she couldn't get herself to love her new life in New York? What if she didn't enjoy her studies? She didn't want to put herself through hell and back if it wouldn't feel worth it to her.

Honestly, she was afraid that she wouldn't ever feel happy again, like Elias had cut out her heart and took off running with it.

"Alright, we're ready to go," one of the movers told her as he walked over to her, sporting a bright orange shirt with the moving company's logo on the left chest area.

Alyssa forced a smile onto her face. She hated how she had to fake everything all the time now.

It was torture saying goodbye to Zoe because she tried to act like she was going to be okay as to not worry her friend.

She even had to lie to strangers. Eventually, she would have to lie very well to herself so that she didn't let her life pass her by.

"Thank you. I guess I'll see you in New York," she said as she glanced at her own car parked nearby. She would meet them at her new dorm. Luckily, she managed to snag a last minute spot.

She couldn't believe that Elias nearly left her completely out of luck when it came to housing. It could've cost her the education that she worked so hard to get!

"Will do," the man said before getting into his truck with his partner. The truck soon rumbled to life with a loud grumble.

Alyssa moved out of the way to stand on the sidewalk, watching the moving truck pull out of the parking lot of her old dorm and head out onto the street to drive away.

She turned to glance back at the dorm building, feeling her chest and throat tighten painfully just at the sight of it.

She spent four years of her life here. Some of that time had been the best times of her life. There were memories in that time that she would treasure forever.

However, on the flip side of that, some of that time had been the worst times of her life. Pain echoed through her when she thought of some of those dark moments.

She knew that they would be nearly impossible to shake.

Tearing her eyes away, Alyssa forced herself to walk to her car. She couldn't stay here any longer. She had to move on if that was even possible.

A piece of her heart and soul would always be here in the place that she met the only boy that she ever loved.

And this town was the place where her heart was shattered beyond repair.

A whole new life awaited her in New York as she ventured down the path of becoming a doctor, but the motivation and drive that she used to have was hardly there any longer.

She could hardly even celebrate her achievements that she earned during her undergraduate career.

Elias left, and he took so much of her with him. She wondered if he knew that. She wondered if he even cared.

Obviously, he didn't since he ditched her, not even bothering to tell her in person. He was a coward, and she was convinced that he never loved her. That wasn't love.

Alyssa got into her car and turned it on, hearing it steadily rumble to life. She stared at her steering wheel, trying to find the strength and motivation to leave this place.

She wanted to, but there was something that wouldn't let go of her. Maybe it was all the memories that she had here.

Maybe it was the nervousness that she felt about going to a new place and starting a new life. Or maybe it was the fact that it would be her final goodbye to Elias.

Maybe some goodbyes were necessary. She hoped that this pain meant something good for her later on. If her time with Elias was the peak of her happiness in life, she didn't know what she was going to do.

She supposed that she could try to find happiness again, but that was a long, dark road. It would be a miracle if she made it to the end of it.

But Alyssa wasn't even sure if she believed in miracles anymore. She didn't even know if she believed in anything anymore.

What was the point if those things never stuck around? With that darkness lingering in the back of her mind, she pulled out onto the street and tried to leave the past behind her.

A/N: Thank you all for waiting!