Nexus Awakened (An Isekai LitRPG Gender Bender Story)

852. We Meet Again, Elysia

“You will chase me to the ends of the world. To hell and back. The tiny, insignificant Cer I locked hands with… following… walking down that same path… it’ll always be the same.”

Raoul also arrived at an epiphany of his own, causing his appearance to further transform. The brimming light of what was once a Star had all but faded away. Dark, red orbs hovered in his eye sockets as he stared back at Cer.

“Never allowing me to speak what I want to say… To hear what I need to hear… to see what I want to see. Raoul. Since when… did it start? The love you showed me wasn’t fake. The serfs of Grandis left me to die. I still remember the faces you made. Brother…”

Cer coughed, attempting to stand on her two feet.

“Your legs will carry you to places where I have tread. As they always have. Even now, you still stand. It vexes me that none of my sisters understand that your own misguided aspirations will lead you to ruin. Corruption would have preserved you. The twins… should have Corrupted. Ber and Res should have never become Moons. You, anointed by the Amalgam. Can’t you see that it’s all temporary?”

“… Raoul. You broadened my horizons. You… were always the one who led me towards a happier place. It was never… a bad thing…” Cer uttered, her mind growing hazy as she took a heavy step forward.

“All rivers lead to a familiar end.”

Raoul, the woman, and Iscario watched as she pitifully attempted to reach them. Her spit was commendable. But it was all in vain. Cer’s body screamed at her, but her mind wanted nothing but to reach Raoul.

“River Styx has created quite a unique assortment of Light-bearing Children of Adam. Not so different from Sildr’s waters that you lapped.”

“A dog will lap wherever there is water. A desperate dog bites what’s closest to it.” Raoul stated tiresomely.

The shadows that surrounded them transferred a pale stone into Raoul’s hand from Iscario. The Brightest Star was like Raoul. Neither of them shone despite their namesakes. Even if they had fallen, there should have been remnants of what made them shine so brightly.

That same light she had used to see surrounding Raoul…

When did it become so dark?

“Your Dimensional Storage is still intact. Keep it safe.”

“… Why aren’t you killing her?” Iscario asked with desperation, as though he could not stand that she was still alive. It went beyond just Cer being their enemy. It was a crazed response that came from something irreparably twisted within. “Why… If that’s your motive… your drive… to lead her on a path of lament… Haha… Ahaha…”

Suddenly Iscario began to laugh.

His laughter filled the air as the trio were consumed by the shadows. Slowly, their bodies began moving away. Their pace picked up and the spear lifted from the crater before disappearing.

“Raoul… how ingenious. Aha… Ilya. Should she return to me… Then a trial of mourning… of repentance… shall pave her a new way. Haha… Ahahahaha! She will learn what she lacks without me by her side. And then… she’ll finally realize it. How much I love her. She will never leave my side again. Ha... HAHAHAHA!"

“Farewell, Cer.” Raoul’s words were the last thing she heard. “You were chosen by mother to sit by her side… Whether mother did love us or not… one day, you will come to tell me of her last message.”

“No… No! Ghk… Ngh… AAAAAGH!” Cer screamed.

She lacked the Defibrillation Stacks to recover from her wounds. The tattered, broken Cer shook her head in disbelief as she staggered towards the fleeting Raoul.

“Is that what you think will happen to me? By leaving me here?” Cer muttered.

Despite her words, she reached out towards the fleeting Raoul with twisted fingers. His form was encased by a dark light. Once again, the light of her one and only star – her hero – Raoul was no longer present.

She had been dreaming of things that were not real. Of a kind Raoul who did no wrong. Something unrecognizable replaced him, yet –

“… you keep on making excuses to spare me…” Cer’s lips trembled as she tried to push onwards.

– Indeed. Raoul could have killed her numerous times. He had even stated that killing Cer would be a favorable outcome. But he refused to take every opportunity to claim her life, as though he could not bring himself to.

She knew, deep down, that the act of killing her would kill what was left of Raoul. Cer entered a brief moment of contemplation. Time seemed to slow around her. The blades of grass that snapped beneath her bare feet floated like confetti.

She thought about Raoul. How things came to this. Cer wondered if there was anyone for Raoul when he had to watch his mother lose her memories. When she died. When his sisters cried for their mother. When the twins lost their minds…

In the end, it boiled down to his inability to help them in the first place.

But Cer remembered it differently from him. She wished that Raoul would realize this, but alas…

“I’m still… not fast enough… to reach you.”

Suddenly, a dark spear was hurled in her direction. Nothing could stop it. Four streams of darkness emanated from the tip of the spear in the shape of a star. Her death was coming, and there was nothing she could do but accept her fate.

*Tick*

*Tock*

But her legs did not stop moving. She was determined to keep following that star that she always had till the bitter end. Despite having confronted him directly, she still felt like she had not even reached him properly.

That star only became more distant.

*Tick*

*Tock*

She blinked once.

Suddenly, she found herself standing in a world split between darkness and light. Nothing but a blue sky of low-altitude clouds and a shallow sea existed here. Cer didn’t need to ask the name of the person who had brought her here.

That ticking was evidence enough of where and who she was in the presence of.

“Elysia. Why did you bring me here again?”

“Have you considered my offer from the last time we met?”

Cer wanted to laugh. To spit in the face of this being that stood behind her. Her shoulders slumped forward. Half of her body was trapped in the side of darkness. Her long, straight-cut touched the waters as her eyes struggled to find a place to land.

“I can’t.” She whispered, her knees slowly bending as she crouched above the water’s surface.

There, in her reflection stood Elysia. She carried a white parasol this time and held it above Cer, shading her from the light of the other side.

“Can you tell me why you can’t?”

“I don’t want to be eaten. The artificial faces and phases of the moon I’ve put on did nothing to turn him my way. My jester acts only made a fool out of me.”

“You were always the serious one of the triplets despite what they believe.”

“Why was it that you wore these personas?”

“So that he could look my way. As always. It was always for him. But along the way, it was a way for me to try to make the twins smile.”

“Was it for Raoul’s sake?”

“Was it? We loved them. I… loved them so much. The personas helped me hide the raw part of me. People despised me for being who I was. The Cer that I knew was me before the phases of the moon was the Cer that was punished for things she never did. The lashes, the deprivation of my meals, how I was beaten and wrapped into a sack. Thrown into a river to drown…”

“Isn’t that why you tried to make yourself more appealing?”

“It was. At its core, it was always because of that. Getting into trouble on purpose was to attract Raoul’s attention. But it never worked. None of it worked. It was just the old Cer who he cared about. But I doubt it now.”

Cer saw a vision of herself within the reflection. It was of a Cer who clasped onto Raoul’s hand, following him wherever he went. She looked up at his eyes, seeing a gaze that looked somewhere other than where he was.

“Raoul… slowly, gradually, eventually – outpaced me. The hand that felt so close grew distant. I thought I could take it back.”

“Do you know why he began to diverge from you?”

“Everything is an answer. But it was because of that hand that refused to hold me that I eventually followed in his footsteps. I had no one to guide me but the light of my hero. My star.”

“Does it feel better to stay where you are than to chase him?”

“My pain could have been avoided if I just…” Cer took in a deep breath and slowly began to lower her face towards a lethargic reflection of herself. “… stayed still…”

“Cer. What do you see yourself as?”