My Pick Up Artist System

Chapter 234 Use Somebody

*Shhshhshh*

In Ben’s dorm bathroom, the shower water sprinkled against the ground, creating a peaceful zen-like melody...that was broken by Ben wailing his heart out while lathering shampoo.

"I’ve been roaming around~

Always looking to pound and all I see~

...

Painted faces fill the places I can’t reach~

...

You know that I could juice somebody~

...

You know that I could juice somebody~

...

Someone like you and how you blow and how you squeak~

...

Countless lovers~

Fart bomb covered in Latrine~

...

You know that I could juice somebody~

...

You know that I could juice somebody~

...

Someone like you~

Ho~ oo~ ooo~ Ho~ oo~ ooo~

Ho~ oo~ ooo~ Ho~ oo~ ooo~

Ho~ oo~ ooo~ Ho~ oo~ ooo~

Ho~ oo~ ooo~ Ho~ oo~ ooo~

End of the night, while others give up~

I’m off to creep~

...

Waging wars to find a ho to beat my meat~

...

I hope it’s gonna be explosive~

...

I hope it’s gonna be explosive~

...

Somewhat like pee!~

Ho~ oo~ ooo~ Ho~ oo~ ooo~

Somewhat like pee~

Ho~ oo~ ooo~ Ho~ oo~ ooo~

Somewhat like pee, somebody~

Ho~ oo~ ooo~ Ho~ oo~ ooo~

Ho~ oo~ ooo~ Ho~ oo~ ooo~

I’m ready now

Give heady now

Teeth shreddy now

Stay steady now

I’m sweaty now

Nutted already now

D*ck’s spaghetti now

...

(Jizztar solo)

...

Ho~oo~ooo~ Ho~oo~ooo~

Someone like you, somebody~

Someone like you, somebody~

Someone like you, somebody~

"I’ve been roaming around~

Always looking to pound and all I see..."

As he finished his version of "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon, Ben was full of emotions. Covered by the running shower, he couldn’t tell if the water dripping from his head was from the shower...or tears...from his penis...

He wasn’t the only one at a loss though, because Fariq was sitting at his desk with a troubled expression, looking in the direction of the bathroom. ’What is the matter with his brain?’

...

When Ben turned off the shower, his mood was much better. Although he didn’t get much sleep the night before, it was worth it, if for nothing else than the system rewards he was about to eat.

Since he was already in private, he opened his system screen and began multi-tasking, reading notifications while drying himself off with a towel.

[Congratulations! You’ve completed the Special Optional Challenge: Mission Inc*ckable - Seduce a new woman, who is an 8+ in looks, from your current location within the next 4 hours]

[Reward: Stat Point(Random) x1]

[Punishment: Incurable impotence for 3 months]

Reading the punishment still caused him to shudder a bit. It was really a close shave this time.

[Completion status: 1/1]

[Distributing reward: Stat Point(Random) x1]

[Assigning Stat: Seduction Skills+1]

Smiling, Ben opened his stats window to check where he was at with everything.

[Looks: 6 - You look like a balloon artist at a gender reveal party]

...

’I wonder how much that pays...’

[Charisma: 8 - Suited to lead...Lemmings off a cliff]

...

Ben blinked, but soon recovered. ’Just cause I’m suited for it doesn’t mean I have to do it.’ He was planning to dodge the Lemmings army draft...

[Social Status: 6(5+1) - High-end office furniture]

He squinted. ’So it is high-end...’

...

[Seduction Skills: (+1)7 - Strong game if used on a 2 A.M. server at a hot dog stand]

...

Ben didn’t mind the dig, because the system mentioned nothing regarding the sexiness of the server...

Implications of greasiness weren’t enough to bring down his hot dog.

...

Instead, he was in a good mood, because after lots of hard work, his seduction skills were at a respectable level at last. The night prior, when Ben was having sex with 34C...he completed the challenge and felt the information related to seduction in his head become more accessible and robust. Yet, he stopped paying attention after about .01 seconds on account of being f*ckupied.

...

Now that he concentrated and reviewed his knowledge though, it did seem he held a more thorough understanding of all the concepts he’d learned until now, as well as how to apply them. He smirked imagining his conquests in the future.

[Knowledge: 6 - Knowledgeable like a mini-encyclopedia...of porn]

"Thank you." Ben felt pride...

[Manliness: 7 - Like you were baptized in soy sauce]

...

Ben envisioned himself as a human spicy tuna roll...

[Communication: 7(6+1) - Skilled...at hissing in a street fight]

...

Ben wasn’t against it. ’As long as I win, or at least don’t lose...’

In fact, he felt a bit of gratitude to the system for providing him with the idea...

It seemed like a good tactic...

[Personal talent: 3 - Natural talent at putting his socks on with his feet in the air]

’It’s time-efficient!’

...

Ben understood that life was short...and so were his legs...

Shaking his head, he moved onto the rest of his status screen. Besides his stats, most other things remained the same:

PUA Points: 37,500

———

Equipped Title: C*ckpuncher,

Unequipped Titles: Poison Dragon, Virgin Surgeon M.D

———

[Current Hearth Tower Ranking: 682]

———

[Base Bloodline: Human]

[Bloodline Enhancements: Elite Human(+1): Personal Talent Max Potential+1]

The only thing that changed here was he gained some more points. That’s why Ben’s next move was to review his achievements in order to understand which of his actions earned him the difference. Despite the points total increasing though, it still hadn’t reached the 50,000 target he was aiming for, where he hoped a new store item would become available and give him some more options.

After all, an increase from 5,000 to 50,000 was massive. Something that cost that much couldn’t be bad and would have a very high chance of changing everything for him. Of course, it was all still speculation. In addition, even if he received nothing new or it wasn’t something he chose to buy, he could still purchase a bunch of other things.

For now, Ben smiled as he began to read his achievements, reliving his accomplishments last night at Latrine, which all led to the final prize—34C, and her booty chest which would serve as desert.

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*Author’s Note: The schedule for this week’s voting chapters is in the creator’s thoughts section following this. Thank you all for your support!